Then my new year's wish would be a reversal of this wretched fate. Or if not, a deep and true understanding of my current karmic cycle.
Everything is in a disarray. Everything doesn't make sense now. The light of clarity evades my grasp. I am lost.
Can someone just pass by and save me from this? I'm drowning and gasping for air. Someone stop this unrelenting rain.
Just decided to have a lunch out on the last work day of the year...
Started out with using Billy's SLR, but since it lost Battery life I switched to my P&S Fuji. so here are the back up photos till i get a hold of the shots i made with Billy's...
Made big decisions and gone on little adventures...What is the difference between loving a person and being in love with a person?
Loving a person is giving what you have. Doing what you can for the other. You will never want to hurt the person. In Love? It's being stupid and losing yourself. A blur of passion and reason. You will do anything and even an extra mile for the person that you are in love with. Being in love is giving more what you can offer. A leap of faith. An acceptance of everything.
To love is a choice but to be in love, well you just find yourself in it.
You can never really define the difference between the two.
But, I know that I am still "in love" with someone. Something that is wrong and never should be anymore. I know I can't and I shouldn't but still I do. And it pains me everyday. I want it to end already to make it go away. But it's hard. I'm surprised I'm having a hard time about it.
I'm just a fucked up guy searching for his own peace of mind. I'm not perfect.
Two albums...
Snapshots #9 Greenbelt and the Compass
All I wanted was to just live in a peaceful and very neutral life. A life devoid of battles and drama. A perfect picture of a lazy old man sitting by the edge of a stream and waiting for fish to tug at the line.
But, growth jumps on you with a serious thump.
Instead, I get a barrage of serious blows to the face that leave me toothless, weak-kneed and bruised. A very despicable scene where you hear the crowd cheering on for my demise. I barely roll with the punches and get hit by the boot a thousand times.
And yet I still manage to stand up and dust myself off, bravely wearing my scars. Steadily walking towards the next tempest of madness with a glimmer in the eye and a broken smile.
Juno: so... I'm sorry... I've thought about it very hard. Really really hard and it's this...
Mac:...
Juno: We're not ready and we seem to just be using each other. Maybe it shouldn't be us. Maybe we have this to make us realize how f*%ked up we are. We couldn't just fool each other, fool ourselves and other people forever. I just want to make it clean.
Mac: I agree. We shouldn't just crap anytime, anywhere or with anyone. I know it's wrong and I've been denying it. I'm sorry, too... So, this is it I guess...
Juno: I think so. It's for the better... We don't want to end up getting trapped and hurt in the long run.
Mac: I like you, you know? I was willing to give it a chance.
Juno: But, It's not enough.
Mac: I know...
Mac: I wonder what will happen to us... will we ever get saved?
Juno: The only saving that we can get is from ourselves...
Mac: Good luck...
